Nine months of my third pregnancy and the night before our delivery day feels HUGE. I’ve been so upbeat and cool about everything for all these forty weeks and now I find myself unable to sleep. I can’t believe we’re finally here on the eve of delivering our baby!
I’ve been inundated with loving messages all week and been basking in the love. Now that we’re so close to delivery I’m feeling anxious that everything should go well.
The eve of delivery day anxiety
The more Ashley and I spoke about the actual delivery tomorrow the more we both started to panic a bit. For him, it’s bad because he is able to see everything during the delivery (I’m having a Cesarean). And all I could think about today was the Youtuber mom I used to follow right up until her delivery. She died during childbirth leaving her husband and toddler behind. In this day and age things can still go wrong. I’m also thinking of another influencer I follow locally who’s seemingly completely healthy baby was born with so many serious health issues undetected on the scans.
I’m not a pessimist and usually by the grace of God I am very faith-filled. But delivering a baby is a big deal and always risky.
I’ve literally had to drag myself through every hour of today praying and rebuking these thoughts.
Practising putting my faith in action by believing Jesus above all others when He said “not to be anxious about tomorrow”.
Repeating this to myself and allowing God’s peace to replace any worry:
Philippians 4:6-7 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
God’s brought us this far and I’m having to look around me and remind myself of all His goodness and great big love for us! And how this is a baby I’ve prayed for, a blessing!
Every step through my pregnancy has been prayerfully seeing how God’s moved circumstances in our favor down to each practical detail.
The tasks I absolutely had to do on the day before delivery day
It’s so ridiculous the hundred and one random tasks I suddenly had to get done today! Chores, laundry, sending Ashley to the shop for eggs, wanting to change the curtains and sending out an invoice. Even writing a love note to the kids and reminding them to brush their teeth!
Also writing this blog post when I really should be sleeping! I don’t know why but I suddenly panicked about how incapacitated I’d be post-birth and wanted everything done today.
The help I didn’t think I’d need
When Ashley took his paternity leave from the day before delivery I thought it was completely unnecessary. I have to admit it was such a blessing to have him home today!
He took care of the big kids, cooked, fetched meds to make me comfortable with my cold and even did some last-minute chores. All I did was sleep all day as much as possible with my bouncing tummy.
Our final day as a family of four
Alex and Josh are so excited to welcome their new sibling home. Alex has been shadowing me all day. She even made up the cot linen all by herself!
She had a small meltdown right before bedtime about not wanting me to leave for the hospital. I reminded her about a library book we’d read about a little girl who’s Mommy went to the hospital to deliver her baby sibling. And how exciting it was when her baby sibling came home and she got to hold the baby lots!
The kids kept repeating how today was our final day as a family of four which is true! Life as we know it will change tomorrow when we welcome our littlest member of the family. Such a big thought!
So here we are with hours to spare! I’ll probably end up having to calm Dad’s nerves more than mine because he has gone very silent this evening.
As we cling to each other tonight we are reminiscing on the other two times we brought a baby home and how we should try to enjoy our last night of uninterrupted sleep. Tomorrow it all looks like a different picture!
Send us good thoughts and we can never have enough of your prayers for a safe delivery, friends!